WEEK 9

January 1 - 7, 2007

New Year’s Day was essentially like any other around here with the single exception of sleeping in. Since we didn’t get back to our rooms until nearly 0400, we slept in until 11ish. Once fully awake and showered we ambled over to the DFAC for a little nutrition. These special operations folks seem to have a handle on celebrations with renewed decorations and bottles of Welch’s Sparkling Cider at every table for every group. We used that cider to wash down roast beef, turkey, pork, potatoes, gravy, and the like. I topped that bounty off with an ice cream sandwich and headed back out into the frigid Afghanistan air for a walk down to the shop.

What else is there to do when you are a half-world away from everything other than work or write weekly letters? We have work that is just waiting for us to become immersed in it, so why not? We jumped into putting that armor into our first vehicle (which is also the largest and most difficult). I mean today is a Monday isn’t it? According to Ed, every day here is a Monday. So what if it is a holiday in the U.S.; the LNs don’t have today off and somebody has to keep them in check, so working was no big deal. I may sound a little bitter about working on the 1st of January, just like the 25th of December, but it is certainly better than being bored.

Craig D bought a TV today from the PX. It’s a 20” JVC that he paid $129 for to put in his room. I’m excited about this prospect because we will be able to watch the upcoming Seahawks football game this weekend from his room instead of the places like the JOC or the DFAC where tons of folks are huddled around the big screens and people are expected to actually work while the game is on. I helped Craig with running the cable into his room and hooking up that monster box. I say ‘monster’ because the case of that TV is huge. It’s at least 28” x 28” x 28”. The plastic alone in forming the case to hold the glass tube cost at least $100 somewhere. I didn’t think he would be able to fit it into his room, but somehow managed. Anyway, I am looking forward to some NA beers and football Sunday morning.

I made several attempts at calling a variety of you from Christmas through New Year’s but experienced: “All circuits are busy now. Please try your call again later.” Between fighting through the rain forest of people with my machete to get to a phone and the sheer MDMP (Military Decision Making Process) of applying COAs (Courses of Action) for the correct timing, I had success at very few telephone connections. Bagram is home to only a scant 17,000 people with nearly 300 phones on base. With today’s technological breakthroughs in digital communications and a favorable people to phone ratio, you would have thought I could call at ease and will. And to top that off, the guy standing behind me could care less if I was not getting a connection, he wanted his shot at dialing someone and I was impeding his ability to do so.

Brian N left last night to fly back through Fort Bliss and then onto Fort Lewis as his unit has completed their tour of duty and is heading home. Obviously I am excited for him to return home, but I will certainly miss having him around here. Ed and I knew a bunch of the folks of Brian’s unit and went down to the PAX Terminal last night to shake a bunch of hands, pat folks on the back, and wish them well. We spent a couple of hours doing so and it was time well spent. It was awesome to be in the presence of everyday Washington National Guard men and women who were plucked from their civilian lives and transported to an environment a half world away where they spent a year combating terrorism. Their jubilation in returning home was infectious and I left them feeling mighty proud.

Running without Nelson isn’t much fun. Brian and I had about the same pace and I loved listening to him complain about the cold and what-not as we ran around Bagram. Brian and I have run together many times in places like Fort Hunter-Liggett, Camp Murray, Fort Lewis, and Yakima Training Center. Without a doubt, he provided a level of motivation to run that I do not necessarily possess by myself. Trying to get Craig D or Ed to run with me is tiring as neither has any aspirations to do so and if I can get them to run with me, they jog while I walk (well, OK a brisk walk). I guess I will have to find some 25 year old stud soldier who can keep up with me. This could be an exhaustive search.

Our cold streak has not relented, not one little bit. Although everyone here says we are in Afghanistan, I’m beginning to think I am in the Arctic or the Northern-most tip of Iceland. I’m gonna have to consult with my travel agent. It is still in the single digits in the morning and the highs get into the 20s. Not only has my motivation to run been reduced because of Nelson’s departure, but building up the courage to brave 8 degrees has been insurmountable. I do have my limits, you know. I have yet to usurp my common sense for the benefits of exercising in the foothills of the mighty Hindu Kush. I suppose I should seek the warmer climes of the indoor gym where they have treadmills if I truly want to run. I do despise those things as the feel and view are less than desirable. I cannot walk properly for nearly 30 minutes afterward. Surely, Kirsten, you know what I am talking about.

You know, this ice thing is beginning to annoy me. I jogged over to the bathroom this morning from my hut (because it is freakin’ cold at 0530) and as soon as I stepped inside the building, I slipped on a newly formed ice skating rink. Fortunately I still had a grip on the doorknob and grabbed one of the courtesy panel posts with the other hand to prevent my fall although I clearly envisioned and relived my fall with the Christmas tree on my front porch two years ago in mere mili-seconds. Talk about getting your heart racing in the morning! I guess the failure of the Chigo to combat the frigid temperatures caused one of the pipes indoors to freeze and burst thereby spraying water into single digit air on a concrete floor. Eventually the air caught up with the spray and froze this ice sculpture from the pipe. I should have grabbed my camera and taken a picture as it was a sight to behold, but I had no intention of circumnavigating this ice floe again. In any case, I finished what I intended to do here and made no attempt to flush the urinal. Upon leaving, I used both hands and arms to brace myself across the frozen expanse as I gingerly shuffled my feet toward the door and outside where the snow and ice there provided a much better surface to walk.

There for a while I thought going to the USO at 2200 hours (my time) was great to IM Kris. She and I could chat while the kids were at school and discuss issues regarding the everyday life of an American family with kids. It seemed to work with the single exception of getting an internet connection. It seems a couple of hundred folks have the same idea that I have. The wireless router in the USO can only accommodate a limited number of connections simultaneously and at full capacity spreads that bandwidth down to something like 15kbs. Chatting Kris became miserable as more people jumped onto the network. Finally after having connection problems for a couple of days, I abandoned this idea in search of another. Stay tuned to see what brilliant solution I come up with.

Recently, the Bagram Safety Office has run into a little money. We have this main street on the North end of the base where I live and work named Disney Street (after a deceased soldier named Jason Disney, not Walt) that everyone uses. To get their safety messages out, the safety office purchased four 3’ x 4’ electronic screens. Two each are mounted back to back (so they can be seen by both directions of traffic) at the ground level. The two sets of screens are positioned at opposite ends of Disney Street. Although these screens must have been the brain-child of some up-and-comer, the two messages that continually flash across the screens are juvenile. They are: ‘Reflective safety belts are required in the hours of darkness’ and ‘Electric heaters are prohibited in buildings’. That’s it. Thousands of dollars spent to repeatedly inundate or psyche with those words of wisdom. It’s nice to know that in the middle of a designated combat zone, everyone to include soldiers wearing camouflage uniforms are required to wear a reflective belt and forego the comforts of warmth while in a building. Really; I don’t make this stuff up.

Craig and I turned on his TV in his room promptly at 0530 Sunday morning to watch the Dallas-Seattle football game. It was being broadcast live on NBC through AFN which is why we were watching it at that time of day as opposed to Saturday evening for you folks. I brought some Bittburger Drive NA beers (Craig is too good for that Three Horses stuff Maassen) and Kashi Cherry and Chocolate Granola bars. What a combo! Craig D mostly slept through the game as opposed to my fervent begging and pleading for Seattle to take control and man-handle the Cowboys. As you all know, Seattle pulled out a win (barely) and I could wear my Seahawks jersey that day with pride. I’m not sure many people saw my number 8 Hasselbeck jersey underneath my new fleece REI expedition weight jacket which was encapsulated beneath my Mountain Hardware Arctic Parka, but I wore it with pride anyhow.

Well, that pretty much concludes my ninth week away from you folks. As I begin to fall into a routine here, I am slowly losing my lust for real beer (um, maybe not) and beginning to really appreciate things like thermal clothing, gloves, and ear-warmers. I am developing quite a skill at producing furniture out of cheap plywood and 2 x 4s, while simultaneously expanding my mind with well-written and thought-provoking articles from Stars and Stripes. I have dropped 15 pounds in weight, lost 2” on my waist, increased my chest by a whopping inch (I’m catching up Charles), and am growing my hair longer. It’s still trimmed around my ears, but is longer on the sides and top to match the length of my mostly grey goatee. Ta-da! See you next week.

Craig